Sunday, December 15, 2013

The Critical Mom and Puberty, Round Two

The boundlessly energetic soccer-goal-scoring eleven-year-old has a hoarse voice and Mommy thought it was a sore throat.  Oops, voice changing.  He has just been invited to a birthday party by a girl.
"I don't know why she would invite ME!"  An incredulous look.  My husband and I lock eyes, each willing the other not to announce, "Because she likes you!" which I made the mistake of telling his older brother once upon a time back in our first round of sixth grade.
Our soccer player makes a hobby of getting his teacher's goat.
"Hey, Mom, here's a note in my assignments book you have to sign."  I read it.  It reminded me of the time his first-grade teacher scribbled a similar note complaining that our kid had burped extra-loud on purpose and disturbed the class.
This time, the teacher had said, "if one more person makes one more sound I'll write a note in your book!"
So our kid said, "Beep!" and handed her his book.
His teacher is blonde, sweet, quite beautiful, and would be most suited to leading a class of repressed, placid, not overly intelligent little girls.  Instead she's got the boys, most of whom are extremely bright and none of whom like to sit still.  In English class she makes them sing, 

Miss Polly had a dolly who was sick, sick, sick.
So she phoned for the doctor to be quick, quick, quick.
The doctor came with his bag and his hat
And he knocked at the door with a rat-a-tat-tat.
He looked at the dolly and he shook his head
And he said “Miss Polly, put her straight to bed!”
He wrote on a paper for a pill, pill, pill
“I’ll be back in the morning yes I will, will, will.” 

Now, the very few girls in the class enjoy waving the props as they sing:  holding up the dolly, then the doctor's bag.  After that they sing "Five little ducks" and the girls squeak the rubber ducks.  Our kid scowls and pretends to mouth the words when the teacher is looking,  and when she looks away, he stands thinking of what a mess Percy and Annabeth have gotten themselves into, falling into Tartarus, and whether Drakon will rescue them.

Here's hoping they give our soccer player some tough old war horse who understands guys next year.  


  1. Just because many girls are, well, girly, and just because many girls want to please, does not necessarily mean that at least some of these types of girls aren't bright. I'm ok with the judgemental quality of your blog--many blogs are--and I obviously I like the blog enough to read it. I get that you want to support your child, and I get that the teacher didn't understand boys. But..the mean spirited quality of part of this post really, really irked me.

    from "Just Another Anonymous Reader"

  2. Wait, I missed anything mean spirited - to what is J.A.A.R. referring please?

    Toby Waters

  3. I think J.A.A.R. means that she believes me to be implying that girls are dumber than boys. Moi? Nein, nein, nein! But I've seen groups of girls and I've seen groups of boys. I've seen smart kids and dumb kids of both sexes. I've been teaching a very long time . . . thirty years. What I really meant to say was that this particular teacher is a type that does well with sedate, well-behaved little girls who are disinclined to ask questions, be rude, or generally flaunt a need to rebel.
    Thank you both for responding, and do write back!

  4. Yes - that's what I read too - that you were commenting on the teacher's capacity, rather than condemning girls. Toby

  5. Yes, that was my intention. Is that square with you, J.A.A.R?